Kate Berlant on ‘Parmesan,’ Phone Compulsion and the Comedy of Failed Performances

A conversation built around ‘Parmesan’

In the “Kate Berlant” episode of Good Hang with Amy Poehler, the host and comedian discuss Berlant’s HBO comedy special Parmesan alongside the experiences and preoccupations shaping her work. Their expansive conversation moves from phone use and gender performance to childhood mimicry, physical comedy and Berlant’s longtime collaboration with John Early.

Why an unserious title leads to serious questions

Berlant says Parmesan began as a deliberately ridiculous temporary title, although it ultimately connected to a joke in the special. She explains that the joke considers what people choose to comment on through phones and social media, and how those small attempts at connection can contain an existential dilemma. That tension—between absurd language and deeper unease—also defines much of her exchange with Poehler.

Stepping away from scrolling—and returning

Discussing her relationship with her phone, Berlant recounts taking several breaks from social media, including one lasting six weeks, before returning to scrolling. She describes how phone use can masquerade as rest even when it does not feel restorative. In her experience, several weeks away allowed old memories to resurface and made her feel more attentive to her inner life. She presents this as a personal struggle rather than a universal prescription, saying the loss of intimacy with oneself is what she finds most troubling.

Comedy, gender and the pressure to perform

A central idea in Parmesan grew, Berlant says, from a teenage encounter in which a boy warned her that men could be uncomfortable with funny girls. She and Poehler use that memory to explore comedy as a role historically coded as masculine, while Berlant explicitly acknowledges that men who appreciate funny women do exist. The discussion broadens into sexuality and identity: Berlant describes falling in love with a woman as opening a new possibility, but resists treating personal categories as fixed or perfectly performed.

Berlant also agrees with Poehler’s observation that movement helps regulate her onstage. She says exaggerated expressions and physical choices bring her back into her body, while Poehler compares laughter and dancing to ways of releasing anxiety. Their discussion frames performance as both an artistic tool and an everyday habit, illustrated by Berlant’s comic story about pretending to protect an invented shoulder injury long after a fellow airline passenger had stopped paying attention.

The creative language she shares with John Early

Early recalls that he and Berlant became nearly inseparable soon after meeting in their twenties, while Berlant calls him one of the great loves of her life. Both describe a shared comic fascination with passive aggression, authority and social niceties that fail to hide what someone really feels. Berlant rejects the idea that their character exchanges are simply mean; for her, the pleasure lies in watching a supposedly controlled performance crack. She says Early’s mock-hostile messages about her career make her feel safe and loved—a private comic language built on trust.